Well it's come to the point where I have allowed myself to fall off the wagon again when it comes to my health/weight loss.
<---Can't see me but I fell of the back end! I feel horrible again (was feeling better when I was walking almost every day) and I feel tired all the time again. I have to go to WW tomorrow morning and I really don't want to but I have to for ME. It is in fact About Me!
My Mil called and asked me if I wanted to go to Weight watchers tomorrow and I had every chance to say no but I really have to go tomorrow to face what I did the last week.
I hate that I cannot control this eating! It seems that food has control of me and I keep finding excuses as to why I can eat this or that.
I have not been counting my points lately either which I really need to start doing. So far I have lost a total of 5 lbs since I started over a month ago and I KNOW I could have done better and exercised more and LOST more but I just didn't do it.
So tomorrow I will jump on that WW scale and feel demoralized yet again.
What I need is to feel empowered and just know that I am doing all I can be doing to get this weight under control. I have not gotten on the scale and I don't want to because I know I have gained. I don't even want to know how much. I guess I will find out tomorrow.
I should go to the Y tonight and I may, depends on Nick and if I can find a sitter...OR I can take Nick with me...if I go before 6pm that is. I just may do that and then I can get a little of my self-respect back. I need that!
Maybe,...just maybe it will even take off a pound too! I can't and I won't eat anything else tonight. I had an early dinner so I won't need to. I will NOT have a soda and will have lots of water tonight. Just maybe I will be able to weigh in where I was when I left for my trip. THEN we have to weigh in again on Sat (our regular weigh in day) again so I really need to keep on track because I have three days to lose SOMETHING again before my next weigh in. I have to say though that I'm really glad that I'm going with my MIL because It helps keep me in line. I would NOT have lost that 5 lbs without knowing that she was going to see my passport (I'm not sure why i call it that but I just do...it's really NOT a passport lol).
Well, I think it's time to get on my walking shoes and get my butt to the Y and enjoy my walk. I have my Ipod all charged and ready to go so there is NO excuses! And it's not even Monday so the volleyball teams will not be there either. I really think i need to watch some of my old "Biggest Loser" tapes and feel motivated in some way. I can't wait until it starts this fall.
5 comments:
The hard thing for me about Biggest Loser now is that so many of them have put the weight back on! I want people to live thinfully ever after... know what I mean?
Hope you're having a great walk RIGHT now!
*hugs*
heather
There is NO looking back, only looking forward. Go to WW and hold yourself accountable, I think that is the most important thing, to go and check in even if you know you had a bad week. Owe up to it. And just move forward ;)
You will get there, hang in there.
Hugs
Ang
P.S. It's not demoralizing. If you don't want to know, just tell them you do not want to know and close the book and walk away. You should never feel little about weighing in. Showing up means your doing good, think better of yourself!!!!
I am getting back on track today too.. I am going to WI tonight at WW.. I don't want too either, but that is what it takes to get me back on track.
We can do it!!
Dondie
I came across your page because it was listed on the main page. Being new to blogging, I am visiting people's pages to determine the different blogging methods. I like your page. I too am trying to loose weight. I wish you luck today at your meeting.
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